Diminished

I feel that society is telling me that I'm suppose to feel lucky that my child only has diabetes.  I'm suppose to tell my 9 year old that things could be worse.  I am to diminish all his pain, anger and frustration from the last 7 years because he "just has diabetes".  Will I?  HELL NO.

My child has every right to feel sorry for himself.  He has endured 13,000 pokes to his fingers and toes.  His insulin pump needle has been changed over 300 times.  He's had over 30 blood draws.  Everything he's eaten in the last 7 years has been monitored.  Everything.  He's had to take insulin for every carbohydrate eaten.  Never a break.

His pump is attached to his body 24/7.  It is removed to bathe or swim and then it is immediately attached back to his body.  Why?  Because he would die without it.  Melodramatic?  No, truth.  Without insulin he would go into diabetic ketoacidosis (DKA) in 2 days.  In less than a week he would be dead.  I am to be thankful for this disease?

I've seen him in DKA.  It was November 29, 2005.  He was dehydrated and lethargic laying on a hospital bed.  He was vomiting.  He was dying and he needed insulin.  After 4 days in the hospital & on an insulin regimine he was back.  He came home and Gary and I became full time pancreases.  We've worked our asses off to make sure we never see DKA again.

Now, do I talk about Chase's journey because I feel sorry for myself?  Because I want attention?  HELL NO.  I scream Chase's story from the roof top because I want people educated about this disease.  I want people who have healthy children to not take for granted one second their health and well being because things can change.  For the worse.

So, the moral of this post is:  never, ever, ever tell someone that things could be worse.  You have NO idea what they have gone through.  You have no idea what they are currently going through.  We know things could be worse.  Comparing our suffering to someone else's is futile. 

But, if we want to compare things, chances are, I hug my kids tighter at night than you hug yours.  I take nothing for granted.  I can thank "just diabetes" for that.