Wednesday, October 19, 2011

How to conquer your fear of needles



Insanely large glucose sensor needle (needle comes out leaving in a long strip of microchips to read blood glucose) replaced every 6 days. (Chase gets and extra hour of Wii time for sensor changes.) Infusion site needle (where the insulin comes out of from the pump - this one stays in) replaced every 2-3 days. All placed on the only fatty real estate the kid has on his body - his tushie.


Yesterday I thought of Chase when I had to get my flu shot. I usually wimp out and get the mist, but this year I had to get the shot. He's my hero when it comes to needles coming anywhere near me. If he can do it a couple times a week, I can handle a yearly shot. He's also considerate - he told me to do his sensor needle before his grandma came to our house because it gives her the "hebbie jebbies".

Friday, October 07, 2011

The Rest Is Still Unwritten

Last month it happened again. The call.

"Hey K. What's up?"

"Hey, Susan. L is at the clinic with G right now. Guess what his blood sugar is."

Immediately putting my hand on my forehead I say, "I don't want to."

"Just guess," he prods.

"You're going to make me cry. I don't want to."

"Just do it!"

"Fine, 101," I say bracing for the real number.

"Over 400."

"Crap," is all I can think to say. (I may have used another word.)

K asks me if there could be any other reason for a 400 blood sugar. I can't think of any other possible reason, but I ask him what his son's symptoms were that prompted them to take him in. Frequent urination and constant drinking. Crap. Crap. Crap.

Another call an hour later confirms my fear. His little guy has type 1. I promise to visit them at the hospital the next day.

As I lay in bed that night, my mind kept going back to little G and his family. A year ago this month it was our friends' daughter, "A's", diagnosis that shook me. Memories of Chase's diagnosis day came flooding back both times, yet, and each time I couldn't help but think, "I don't know what they are going through."

In a way, I had a slight advantage to G and A's families. My dad was diagnosed the year I was born. I grew up watching him give himself daily injections of insulin. Sometimes I even "helped" him give himself shots. I knew what insulin smelled like (it's hard to describe if you've never smelled it before). I was raised by a diabetic. I was familiar with the routine.

I consider us lucky in other ways, too. At the time of his diagnosis, Chase was our one and only child. I worked part time and was able to leave work for over a month to learn all I could about diabetes. My day care provider was ready and willing to take him back into her care when I was ready to go back to work. Yes, it really sucked at the time that he was only 2 years old but we were were blessed. He hasn't remembered life any other way.

After having been in this battle for nearly 6 years, it's hard to know what to say when someone else's child is diagnosed (other than "Crap!'). I can't assume to fully know what they are going through. I told A's family that, "It gets easier." The problem with that advice is that I'm not sure I believe it myself. Certain things get easier, but diabetes is always there. Day after day. Year after year. All I was able to muster to G's dad was "Crap." Not exactly the comforting words he wanted to hear, I'm sure.

What I remember from diagnosis day was mourning for Chase's childhood. Birthday parties, trick or treating, holidays, school, sports, traveling - all would be affected by him having diabetes. Oh, how I cried. In reality, though, we've been too stubborn to let it have the staring role in his life. We work around it and he is able to be a happy, healthy, and despite his mother, a normal kid.

I hope to never receive another call, but if I should, my advice is this: Your family story may have taken an unexpected turn, but it is a story still being written. Diabetes will take the role you give it. Don't give it a staring role. Your child will inspire, amaze, and make you proud every day from here on out. It's not the story you would have written, but it's better - it now has a super hero in it.